When you know
As a self employed person, I am constantly hit by questions only I can solve. Questions about my schedule. Questions about my teaching concepts. Questions about my budget. My hopes. My plans. My relationships with people.
Because everything affects everything, because all in my life is interconnected, I am obliged to think through all that comes in contact with me.
But, in order to do that correctly, I need confidence. Answer any question with confidence and it will be easier to deal with than the alternative.
So, where do you get that confidence?
I don’t know about the rest of the world, I’ll talk about me.
It comes from experience. Yes. Parts of it. It comes from mistakes made. Of course, goes without saying. It comes from watching out for my best interest. Maybe. This one is more on the outskirt of things, but we are still in the ballpark.
But mainly, it comes from me. Only me. That’s the part that I cannot do without. The part that will not budge. The part that cannot be bent. Maybe to others it seems arbitrary, or idiotic, or genius.
It has kept me alive the last 50 years. I rely on it.
For things that concern me: Only I know.
I will listen, I will think, I will put everything into the balance. I’ll do all that. No need to be closed to the world. But I am the only one making the final decision. I take responsibility for it. And if it fails, it is my fault. No one else’s. Brilliant or dumb, I have only myself to count on.
Am I nice? Am I difficult?
Don’t know. It is not in the picture. I do what I feel I should do.
And it has produced some good results for me.
So far so good.